God Is Where You Find HerDid I feel relief? Shock? Fear? Actually, I don’t think I gave a thought to how I felt beyond “holy shit!” From the moment I learned they…Dec 4, 20203Dec 4, 20203
He’s Out ThereMost people who’ve spent more than a few nights in the hospital are familiar with the crushing weight of insomnia. I had sleeping issues…Oct 11, 20201Oct 11, 20201
Addendum: It’s the Little ThingsI went outside the other day for the first time in 82 days. “You might want to bring a jacket, it’s in the low sixties,” noted the young…Sep 20, 2020Sep 20, 2020
What Fresh Hell Can This Be?Every day, it’s some new, shitty thing. Today, my roommate, Mr. Billings, is having a conversation with one of his several personalities…Sep 12, 20205Sep 12, 20205
And the Winner is ….So, it turns out that my defribrillator is the tortise. The heart I need is the hare. My defibrillator chugged along, slow and steady, for…Aug 21, 20201Aug 21, 20201
Luck of the DrawIt’s been a little more than a month since I was admitted to NYP Columbia to wait for a new heart. It’s a little more than ten years since…Aug 6, 2020Aug 6, 2020
Screaming Guy“I WANT YOU TO CALL MY WIFE. I AM NOT STAYING HERE ANOTHER NIGHT. I AM NOT STAYING. BRING ME THE PHONE SO I CAN CALL MY WIFE.”Jul 14, 20203Jul 14, 20203
Notes on the Nature of InfirmityI’m currently sitting in the bed in my of my room at NYP Columbia, looking out at the Hudson River on the 4th of July. Things…Jul 5, 20201Jul 5, 20201
Something Closer to the TruthLast night, I went up to the attic and explored that corner where Laura and I keep some folders in dusty document boxes. They hold the…Apr 5, 20201Apr 5, 20201
This is What I Remember, Not What HappenedI remember it was 1994 or 1995. I remember that it was hot. Like really, really hot. Heat wave hot. Do I remember hearing something about…Apr 1, 2020Apr 1, 2020